On 2018-07-31 20:46:06 Veronica Franco said:
A Kiwi ventriloquist visiting Australia walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his veranda patting his dog.
He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Aussie ... 'G'day mate, mind if I talk to your dog?'
Villager: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Kiwi.'
Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going mate?'
Dog: 'Yeah, doin' all right.'
... Aussie: (look of extreme shock!!!)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this villager your owner?' (pointing at the Villager)
Dog: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'
Dog: 'Yeah, real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the lake once
a week to play.'
Aussie: (look of utter disbelief)
Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'
Aussie: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think.'
Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'
Horse: 'Cool'
Aussie: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (Pointing at the villager)
Horse: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: How does he treat you?
Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me
in the shed to protect me from the Elements.'
Aussie: (total look of amazement)
Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'
Aussie: (in a panic) 'That sheep's a fucking liar...'
Lol! "He rides me often...." Love it!
One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.
Wife : If we only had 30 minutes before Apocalypse, what would you do?
Husband : Sex of course.
Wife : Okay..... and the remaining 28 minutes ????!!!!!!
The lady slam a complementary court of Black Label on the counter and tells the old man to go up the stairs and into the first door on the left.
The old man kick the door open and yells "I hope your are the wildest lady here".
The naked lady looks at him, turns around bends over and grabs her ankles.
The Old man say "I will pick the position id like to fuck you in!"
The lady replies "I am not suggesting this position, I am only offering you a place to open that Complementary Beer!"
On 2018-08-13 15:02:23 Tiger_ said:
Old man wins the lotto and decides to visit a whore house for some action. Once there he slams R5000 on the counter and ask the lady for her most experienced lady.
The lady slam a complementary court of Black Label on the counter and tells the old man to go up the stairs and into the first door on the left.
The old man kick the door open and yells "I hope your are the wildest lady here".
The naked lady looks at him, turns around bends over and grabs her ankles.
The Old man say "I will pick the position id like to fuck you in!"
The lady replies "I am not suggesting this position, I am only offering you a place to open that Complementary Beer!"
Lol! Tiger I really enjoyed that.
Lady Sade
Going to bed
Husband says:good night mother of 3 kids
Wife replies:Goodnight father of none
On 2018-08-14 09:34:46 Miss Barbie Doll said:
A couple had a fight one night
Going to bed
Husband says:good night mother of 3 kids
Wife replies:Goodnight father of none
Lol! Thanks for sharing Miss Barbie!
Edited: 2018-08-14 12:57:24
guy says
:i told her
i might not be rich,i have no money or Villa or cars and companies like my friend John.but no one can love you more than me baby
She looked at me with tears in her eyes and hugged me like there was no tomorrow and Whispered in my ear
And said:Baby if you really love me,Please introduce me to John.
Boom
On 2018-08-14 12:56:25 Miss Barbie Doll said:
True love exists
guy says
:i told her
i might not be rich,i have no money or Villa or cars and companies like my friend John.but no one can love you more than me baby
She looked at me with tears in her eyes and hugged me like there was no tomorrow and Whispered in my ear
And said:Baby if you really love me,Please introduce me to John.
Boom
Lol
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