The best tick to keep your girlfriend/wife happy.

Keep your mouth shut and your wallet's mouth open

A WG went to collect clothes from the dry cleaners.

The receptionist handed her the receipt and greeted, 'come again'

She replied : No, toothpaste this time

:)

Something naughty for a Monday...

Q. What does a deaf gynecologist do?

A. Reads lips!!

Her: Will you give me a 34 1/2 ?

Him: WTF is that !!!

Her: Half of 69, basically, just eat my pussy ;)

On 2021-03-15 12:58:23 BOOBS53 said:
Her: Will you give me a 34 1/2 ?

Him: WTF is that !!!

Her: Half of 69, basically, just eat my pussy ;)

Hehhee now I know what to call it. Loooove eating pussy.

A man walks out on his front porch one day and sees a gorilla in the tree on his front lawn.

He calls animal control and about an hour later a man shows up with a ladder, a pit bull, and a shotgun.

The animal control employee tells the man, "I'm here to get the gorilla out of your tree. I'm going to use this ladder to climb up the tree and shake the branch the gorilla is on to knock him to the ground. The pit bull is trained to go after anything that falls from the tree and bites their balls which calms the animal down so I can put him in the truck."

The man says "Okay, I see what the ladder and the pit bull are for but what is the shotgun for?"

The animal control employee says, "Oh, that's for you. In case I fall out of the tree instead of the gorilla."

Clean joke for a change :

There's a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. (...Only a fraction of people will get this)

(In the spirit of the joke above)..

I am so grateful for the plethora of incredible SP's that are advertizing on ESA.
To me,it really means alot.

"The girl I treated like an egg, someone boiled her yesterday"

-Meme

Boyfriend caught his girl masturbating with a carrot.

His first reaction was "Shit, I was gonna eat that later, but now it's gonna taste like carrots!"