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yolan
yolan - Is closure to a past relationship necessary
Is closure to a past relationship necessary
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Posted: 2017-07-31 19:26:37

It's strange sometimes how people leave your life.

Just found myself wondering whether closure is overrated or does it actually effect you in ways you not completely aware of if you don't iron out your issues with the person of a previous relationship which in itself can be a nightmare
[deleted]
[deleted] - Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
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Posted: 2017-07-31 19:52:12

It is not always possible to iron out the issuses. If it is then the possibility is there to rescue the relationship.

You can however find closure without the above. Without closure of the previous relationship the next one is doomed to failure. It will be like a little stone in your shoe. It will irritate the living day light out of you till you can get rid of you.

Finish one, including finding closure before moving on to the next.
hornym
hornym - Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
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Posted: 2017-07-31 19:55:01

Took me 10 years to move on from my ex . I was trapped
Kukuterian
Kukuterian - Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
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Posted: 2017-07-31 19:58:19

It's not working. Leave bitterness behind and move on in peace but never try to close anything cause it leads you back in and before you know it, you are miserable again.
yolan
yolan - Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
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Posted: 2017-07-31 21:23:58

On 2017-07-31 19:55:01 hornym said:
Took me 10 years to move on from my ex . I was trapped





Wow . That's a long time. Glad it's over buddy .

This can be so devastating
yolan
yolan - Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
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Posted: 2017-07-31 21:29:06

I guess sometimes both parties need to be mature enough to want to make peace with things . I do believe it's possible to walk away from something by resolving your issues with somone but again maturity and mindsets need to be on the same page.
nympho_zn
nympho_zn - Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
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Posted: 2017-07-31 21:37:43

It IS essential. After been in a relationship for 6 years, my ex wanted "space". We eventually just drifted apart. She never gave any explanation . 7 years on, it still eats me from within....why....what...how....when.... I'll never know....
The Doll House
The Doll House - Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
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Posted: 2017-07-31 21:45:18

Not all issues can always be resolved. As individuals, we form our own opinions, and rarely want to admit that we may be wrong. My opinion is that if both parties can agree to disagree and respect the others view, peace will invariably follow. I think closure is important in any form of relationship.@yewrev - well said!
Arizona
Arizona - Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
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Posted: 2017-07-31 21:49:04
Edited: 2017-07-31 21:58:09

Up until a few months ago I thought I needed closure on a very profoundly, personally unique relationship I was in. I was battling to let go and move forward, thinking I needed closure from him. Or some kind of one on one, face to face communication. As we had ended our relationship via email, due to being in different countries.

But I realised recently, that I think closure lies within each of us. It's not always about the other person giving you closure. But more about you forgiving yourself, being OK with yourself and realising that no one else determines your worth or happiness.

If you are enough for you, then anyone else in your life is just a perk or benefit.

We all equal yet different, what works for one person doesn't necessarily work for anyone else.

Do you! And what works for you!

Mwah

Arz
[deleted]
[deleted] - Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
Re: Is closure to a past relationship necessary
More than 100 posts
Posted: 2017-07-31 22:03:14
Edited: 2017-07-31 22:03:58

Agree with Arz.

You don't need someone else for closure. You need to close that book all by yourself.

Lock it in a box and walk away. It did not work. If it did not work previously, why will it work now ? Unless you compromise on your own principles and beliefs. And then you are in worse situation.

Lovers/companions/life partners are like sushi on a conveyor belt. Look at what is on offer. If you like it, take it off the conveyor belt and eat it. If it is nice, take the same colour plate and eat some more.

If you start getting gatvol, pay for the plates and go away.
Come back tomorrow night and taste something new.

Might be better than that you had.

Never go back.

Life is too short for regrets. And that fist thing that grinds your guts, that is the sign. Take your toothbrush and run.

Cheers


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