A guyvwas sitting on his own in a restaurant, when he saw a beautiful woman at another table. He sent her a bottle of the most expensive wine on the menu. She sent me a note, "I will not touch a drop of this wine unless you can assure me that you have seven inches in your pocket." He wrote back, "Give me the wine. As gorgeous as you are, I'm not cutting off three inches for anyone."

A guy decides to do something nice for his girlfriend before they leave on vacation so he gets her name tattooed on his penis. He comes home and shows it to her. She looks at it and says, "That's great, sweetie, but what is 'Wy'?" He tells her to rub it and as she does she sees it actually reads "Wendy." When they arrive at Montego Bay, the couple are walking along a nude beach and the boyfriend notices a black guy with "Wy" on his penis. He asks the man if he also has a girlfriend named Wendy. The black guy laughs and says, "Nah, mon, mine says 'Welcome to Jamaica have a nice day.'"

A woman is having a hard time getting her tomatoes to ripen so she goes to her neighbor with her problem. The neighbor says, "All you have to do is go out at midnight and dance around in the garden naked for a few minutes, and the tomatoes will become so embarrassed, they will blush bright red." The woman goes out at midnight and dances around her garden naked for a few minutes. The next morning, the neighbor comes over to the woman's house and asks the woman if her tomatoes have turned red. The woman says "No, they're still green, but I noticed the cucumbers grew four inches!"

LOL. You must go watch Rajiv Satyal on 20 July in Durban. Not as hilarius as Russell Peters or Michael McIntire though.

Excellent jjsoap .. lmao !!!

Life is like a penis, women make it hard for no reason

Haha. Mnr jjsoap, my vote goes to you, for the "punter comedian" of the month.

No, I think he must give up his day job and become a comedian. jjsoap thanks for the good laughs bud. Makes the forum more intersting.