Cards u wish u had but never cud find. Now available at Cardies & CNA -
 
1. I always wanted to have someone, someone to love. And now that you've come into my life...
(Inside card) - I've changed my mind..

2. I must admit, you brought religion into my life....
(Inside card) - I never believed in Hell until I met you.

3. As the days go by, I think how lucky I am....
(Inside card) - That you're not here to ruin it for me ..

4. Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go....
(Inside card) - Will you take the knife from my back? You'll probably need it again.

5. Happy Birthday! You look great for your age....
(Inside card) - Almost lifelike!

6. When we were together, you said you'd die for me...
(Inside card) - Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your promise.

7. Congratulations on your new bundle of joy....
(Inside card) - Did you ever find out who the father was?

8. You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket...
(Inside card) - I'd miss you terribly and think of you often .

9.. Your friends and I wanted to do something special for your birthday...
(Inside card) - So we're having you put to sleep.

10. Looking back over the years that we have been together, I can't help but wonder.....
(Inside card) - What the hell was I thinking

11. I'm so miserable without you...
(Inside card) - It's almost like you're still here.

12. Thank you for being part of my life.....
(Inside card) - I never knew what evil was until I met you!

13. Congratulations on your wedding day!
(Inside card) - Too bad no one likes your husband.

14. How can I say this....
(Inside card) - Your cooking kills me

15. Hooray.....
(Inside card) - You're divorced.

16. I just want you to know that I'm sorry for what happened...
(Inside card) -Especially since you survived.

17. Congrats on getting married....
(Inside card) - It's not everyday you decide to ruin your life.=)) =))

roflmao nice i can do with some of those

Lol don't we all....

Woman: "My husband is going to commit suicide from a window of your hotel... . please come fast!". Manager: "Sorry Mrs, its your personal matter." Woman: "Hurry UP Bastard, the window is NOT opening!!

Son: Dad what is retrenchment??
Dad: Son, well, retrenchment is when you are replaced by a computer at work and a vibrator at home

Bob goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, I'm having trouble getting my penis erect, can you help me?" After a complete examination, the doctor tells him, "Well, the problem with you is that the muscles around the base of your penis are damaged. There's really nothing we can do for you unless you are willing to try an experimental treatment."

Bob asks sadly, "What is this treatment?" "Well," the doctor says, "what we should do is take the muscles from the trunk of a baby elephant and implant them in your penis."

Bob thinks about it silently and says, "Well, the thought of going through life without ever having sex again is too much, let's go for it." A few weeks after the operation, Bob was given the green light to use his improved equipment. He planned a romantic evening with his girlfriend and took her to one of the nicest restaurants in the city.

In the middle of dinner, he felt a stirring between his legs that continued to the point of being uncomfortable. To release the pressure, Bob unzipped his fly. His penis immediately sprang from his pants, went to the top of the table, grabbed a roll and returned to his pants.

His girlfriend was stunned at first and then said with a sly smile, "That was incredible! Can you do that again?"

Bob replied,"Well I guess so, but I don't think I can fit another roll in my ass".

Roflmao good 1

Ash u crack me up LOL... Nice jokes, mwah sweetypie

@ nawtymo I'm glad u had a good laugh....

Here's another good 1....

A married lawyer had sex in his car and forgot the girl's panties in his car. His wife saw the panties in the back seat, tore it apart screaming 'what's this?' He calmly replied, "you just destroyed the evidence of a rape case, worth millions that I'm handling. She quickly went on her knees apologizing. Do you call him Smart, A Good Lawyer or A Damn Good Liar? Give that man a BELLS! LMFAO!!!!!!!!!=))

'n jagse muis is besig om 'n stukkie kaas te pomp, sy maaitjie kom om die draai, sien dit en vra "wat die fok maak jy ??" Muis stop en antwoord. Soos wat lyk dit huh? Kominikasie !!