Why do women don't shake after a wee like men do ?? The can fart and blow dry it !! lol

Dear mr. President, congratulations on your birthday! I would have got you something, but we have already chipped in for Nkandla. Do enjoy!

Hmmm @Arhwen is this competition over or still going?

just before this is closing !! I bough my wife a pear of slippers and a vibrator for her birthday last week ! She ask me why these two presents . I reply to her if you don't like the slippers ! Go fuck your self !

Whats the difference between muff dive and sky dive.
" The View"

So mr Jones has to go overseas on a buisenes trip, to china, so he gets there books into his hotel and quickly gets bored, goes down and get a wg's number from the doorman, she arrives at his room sexy as can be and mr Jones notice one thing, language barrier, but she knows the fee and buisness happens, but as he is busy she yells whangou, he though she is cheering him and he goes on, gain she yells whangou and he puts in more effort and enjoys himself, so the next day back to buisness and the get to the firm and the CEO declares that they will first enjoy a round of golf, so they play and on the sixth hole the CEO hits a hole in one, mr Jones though he will complement the CEO and shouts Whangou!!!. So the CEO turns around and very disgusted asks him, what the hell do you mean wrong hole!!!

A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." The pharmacists eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband! That's against the law! I'll lose my license! They'll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now. That's different. You didn't tell me you had a prescription."

A groom waits at the altar with a huge smile on his face. His best man asks, "Why do you look so excited?" The groom replies, "I just had the best blow job I have ever had in my entire life, and I am marrying the wonderful woman who gave it to me." The bride waits at the other end of the aisle with a huge smile on her face. Her maid of honor asks, "Why do you look so excited?" The bride replies, "I just gave the last blow job of my entire life."

A Boss is like a nappy, always on your ass and usually full of shit!