Sex insurance:

1. Sex with your wife = Legal & General
2. Sex in the car with your wife = Auto & General
3. Sex with someone elses wife = Mutual & Federal
4. Sex with your mother-in-law = Old mutual
5. Sex with another man = Hollard
6. Sex with someone in the spur of the moment = Momentum
7. Sex with your Ex = OUTsurance
8. Sex with a WG = Budget
9. Sex with a stranger = Discovery
10. Wanking off = Miway

A wife got hold of her husband's phone ad found a WG number on it, she confronts him with her discovery"
Wife: you have been visiting prostitutes, are you going to deny? She asked holding up the phone to him
The husband responds in his defense: "it wasn't my fault you stopped giving me any, I am a man with needs and was left with two chooses, leave you and get a girlfriend or stay with you and pay them, what did you want me to do?"
Wife: I don't expect you to do either, you could have told me you were willing to pay for it!"

Blonde: I think my neighbor is a Russian guy.

Friend: Why do you say that?

Blonde: Every morning he writes in the steam on my window: "sboob ruoy em wohS"

I was visiting my daughter last night and asked if I could borrow a newspaper.

"This is the 21st century" she said. "We don't waste money on newspapers. Here use my iPad"

I can tell you this...that fly never knew what hit him...

Hazel... that's a good one... hahahaha... I'll f... hubby every day if his willing to pay me... LOL

What's the difference between your wife and your job?

After 5 years your job will still suck.

On 2018-05-30 14:40:19 GreyKnight said:
What's the difference between your wife and your job?

After 5 years your job will still suck.

LMAO!

On 2018-05-30 14:40:19 GreyKnight said:
What's the difference between your wife and your job?

After 5 years your job will still suck.

LMAO!

On 2018-05-30 10:53:58 GreyKnight said:
Sex insurance:

1. Sex with your wife = Legal & General
2. Sex in the car with your wife = Auto & General
3. Sex with someone elses wife = Mutual & Federal
4. Sex with your mother-in-law = Old mutual
5. Sex with another man = Hollard
6. Sex with someone in the spur of the moment = Momentum
7. Sex with your Ex = OUTsurance
8. Sex with a WG = Budget
9. Sex with a stranger = Discovery
10. Wanking off = Miway

LMFAO!!

A guy goes to the store to buy condoms. 'Do you want a bag?', the cashier asks 'No', the guy says, 'she's not that ugly

Q: Why is santa so jolly?
A: Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Q: Why did God give men penises?
A: So they'd have at least one way to shut a woman up.

Q: What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?
A: Slow down. And possibly use a lubricant.

Q: Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?
A: They don't have balls to scratch.