***SIMPS***

I think that this word is so overused/misused and used mostly to make good, civilised men feel bad for being gentlemen and treating ladies (not psychos) like ladies should be treated.

Here is an article on the topic ...

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"The term 'Simp' is being used to shame men who treat women well and it needs to stop.
Treating a woman well is not 'Simp behaviour', but misogyny sure is.

A simp, by definition, is someone who does way too much for someone they like. That's the Urban Dictionary top definition. It never specifies a gender, but everyone knows simp is used exclusively to describe men, and men's behaviour towards women.

The term is used jokingly, sometimes to describe even the bare minimum level of respect between a man and a woman. A boy buys a girl an Uber home to make sure she's safe? "That's simp behaviour." He messages her first? "He's simping for her." He speaks highly of his girlfriend or the woman he's sleeping with?

"He's such a simp." Women know that the bar for men is so low it's literally in hell, but even now that bar is being tested and lowered by men who fear they're going to be called out by their mates for "simp behaviour".

The truth is that every use of simp -- by men, on men -- even as a joke, is laced with misogyny. Simp is 2020's "that's so gay". It's the current-day version of "don't be a pussy".

The problem with the term simp is that it has moved into the realms of irony. Anyone who's reading this and prickling at my sensitivity right now, consider that even the ironic use of a word carries weight. For example, Harry -- one of my male friends -- said that he and his boy mates use simp exclusively "as a joke" but if you drill down into it, he knows it could be harmful.

"I have used it and I've been called it but only jokingly in my boys chat," he told The Tab. "Often it's when the boys are saying that they want to message a girl, like Ollie would say 'I'm simping for Ella' if he messages her first. I don't think the term is overtly negative but it depends on your group. I'm friends with other boys who use it to outright describe a loss of masculinity -- way more of an insult -- but we use it more jokingly about being sweet."

When I quizzed Harry about how even a joking use of the word simp could affect a man, and sway him away from being "sweet" to girls, he said: "I think it could. Some men can be quite closely affected by stuff like that. There's a lot of pressure for men and they're constantly evaluating how they come across to women -- they have to act a certain way. Being called a simp might make you feel less confident in approaching women. Plus I think the word does perpetuate the stereotype that nice guys finish last. That you have to be a bit of a prick to get a woman or to approach her in the first place, and that's not right."

Another boy, Danny, told me his sister called him a simp when he made a long emotional Instagram post as a joke. He didn't even understand what it meant, thinking it could mean a "soft boi" or something. And if you're questioning the difference between soft boi and simp, know that being a soft boi was never degrading. Soft bois shagged, soft bois were woke, soft bois were cool. But no part of being simp is aspirational, it's one hundred per cent demeaning.

So demeaning that it causes men to change their behaviour entirely. Just ten days ago a 19-year-old girl posted on the r/relationships.txt thread on Reddit complaining that her boyfriend won't hold her hand or be affectionate with her in public because his friends make fun of other boys doing that and call them simps. Her boyfriend is so scared of being a simp that he's actively hurting his girlfriend's feelings to avoid it. He's 21. This word has an effect.

Laurie, another male friend, agrees. He said: "I'm really glad it wasn't around when we were younger, if it had it been around then I reckon we would have terrorised each other."

But just because Laurie isn't in school right now -- doesn't mean other boys aren't. Teenage boys have TikTok, they know what simp means. We need to stop using simp as an insult to men treating women well, because it's going to start shaping young men, and it's already shaping adult men. The boyfriend in that Reddit post was 21, not 12.

I'm not declaring war on the word simp, I'm not saying it should be banned. I'm calling time on it being used to aid misogyny. If a man buys his girlfriend a car after two weeks of dating, sure -- he's a simp. If he comments a thousand love heart emojis on every single one of her Instagram posts? He can be a simp then. If he calls her honey bunny and means it, he's a simp. That's because this behaviour is cringe, over the top and uncommon. Discouraging it won't do any harm. For this kind of behaviour, simp can be the male equivalent to calling a woman psycho -- because God knows we need one.

But for base level, treating-women-with-kindness behaviour, simp should not be used. I don't need to tell you that men are easily affected by man-on-man teasing. I don't need to tell you that men don't need any more excuses to treat women badly, society has given them enough already. So stop using simp and giving them more misogynist avenues to explore. Praise men who take care of women. Praise men who respect and raise up women. Praise men who approach women first in a healthy way. He's not simping for anyone, he's just a better person than you, and he's probably got better game too."

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In the article above, the writer claims that the term "simp" is the male equivalent of the term "psycho" used for problematic women. Made me think of the song by Ava Max - SWEET BUT PSYCHO ... m.youtube.com/watch

***HOPE***

Hi Everybody, during these exceptional times we could all do with some inspiration and an infusion of hope. There is a German saying, "DIE HOFFNUNG STIRBT ZULEST." (Hope is the last to die). Sounds morbid, but it's very true and should encourage us to keep hoping and striving.

I found this very interesting article online, about an experiment done with rats and the most interesting findings. Hope it motivates you as much as it motivates me. :-)

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"Back in the 1950's, Curt Richter, a well-known Harvard graduate and scientist with Johns Hopkins University did a series of rather unorthodox experiments using water, buckets and rats that resulted in an amazing discovery. He wanted to see how long rats could swim before they drowned. Cringe-worthy no doubt! So you ask "What's so amazing about knowing how long it takes for a rat to drown?" Bear with me for a bit longer...

Richter put rats into large buckets, half-filled with circulating water. Being notoriously good swimmers -- the rats lasted about 15 minutes before giving up and succumbing to the depths of the bucket. Not impressed -- I wasn't either. All I was thinking was "Poor rat!" Richter must have read my mind.

In a follow-up experiment, as the rats started to give up and sink, he pulled the drowning rodents to safety, dried them off, gave them a brief period of rest only to put them right back into that same bucket. Here comes the amazing part -- those same rats now swam for an average of 60 hours -- YEP -- that's six with a zero or two and a half days.

A rat that was temporarily saved survived 240 times longer than one that was not given any intervention.

Richter's conclusion: that saving a rat from drowning -- even temporarily, gave that rat hope."

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Everything in Life is a cycle. What goes up, must come down and vice versa.

You win some and you lose some. You can't win all the time ... and the Good News is, you can't lose all the time. YAY!!!


*IF WINTER COMES, CAN SPRING BE FAR BEHIND?*

Here is a short inspiring clip by Dr.Orion Taraban ...

m.youtube.com/watch


Keep On Keeping On ... xxx

***DIVIDE AND RULE***

Some battles seem to be going on since the beginning of time.

If a bunch of individuals consolidate, another bunch will then in turn consolidate and oppose them. Seems to be in our barbaric nature to constantly be on the warpath.I read somewhere that all babies are born Loving. It is our natural state of being. Hatred has to be taught.

Someone recently "tested" my knowledge by asking me who "the first woman created" was called. It was not Eve (according to the myths). Nevertheless, the fight seemed to have started in that garden, with that apple and that serpent and Adam and Eve. It's all getting so very tedious.

Here one of my favourite teachers, TEAL SWAN, explains how we are pitted against one another, by social media (thank you algorithms) which gets us locked into our own little bubbles. Most people are only wanting to be in Echo chambers, which means that they're only interested in discussing things with others who share their same views. Sounds like the height of intelligence to me.

m.youtube.com/shorts/ehyquJQfXdM

Here Dr.Orion Taraban explains the shortcomings of eligible men and women ...


*WHY SUCCESSFUL MEN ARE JERKS*

m.youtube.com/watch


*WHY BEAUTIFUL WOMEN ARE NUTS*

m.youtube.com/watch


Some say, "can't live with 'em - can't live without 'em."

Others say, "can't live with 'em - can't shoot 'em."


Let's Make Love Not War ... (Call Me) ... xxx

***DICK PICS***


Unsolicited Dick Pics - the bane of most adult entertainers' existence. Even regular nine-to-fivers are sometimes subjected to these.

I myself love looking at naked men, but a "disembodied" dick is not that inspiring. Now if it is shown attached to a nice-ish body and face, different story :-)

Why do guys send unsolicited Dick Pics? According to the short below, 18% for their own satisfaction (they get off on it). For 10% it gives them a sense of control over the person. 6% admitted to sending these, because they have feelings of dislike towards women. 80% believed that if they sent a Dick Pic, the recipient would send a nude pic in return or that the recipient would want to hook up with them! Wow. Unbelievable.

Here is the short ... m.youtube.com/watch