Hot lady cop: You are under arrest, anything you say can and will be held against you...
Me: Your boobs...

"A hooker gets arrested one night and the next day stands before the judge. The judge reviews the evidence and decides to sentence the hooker to community service for six months.

Then the hooker goes 'Community service? What do you think I've been doing this whole time?'"

Her (absentmindedly): My lips are dry.
Him (just as absentminded): So they hurt when you walk then?
Her: What?
Him: What?

There is a new condom brand on the market: "Putin"
Made for dicks who dont know when to withdraw.

The word of the day is 'legs'.

Let's go over to my place and spread the word :)

On 2018-07-24 15:19:08 uwillwantme said:
Here goes :

A bear walks into a restaurant and say's "I want a grilllllled.............................................cheese." The waiter says "Whats with the pause?"

The bear replies "Whaddya mean, I'M A BEAR."

It took me a second but when it clicked in my head I was like KWAAAA

HAHA nice one

When is the only time a woman cant multi task or talk back???

When Her mouth is full

Lols

Some guy called me a tool. So I got hammered and nailed his girlfriend. Guess he was right.

A farmer had a three legged pig and his neighbor asked him why the pig had only three legs.

"Well, I'll tell you" the farmer replied. "One day I was plowing my field and the tractor turned over and pinned me underneath. That pig ran for help. He saved my life".

"Oh, that's how he lost his leg?" the neighbor drawled.

"No. One night my wife and I were sound asleep and the house caught on fire. That pig woke us up. He saved our lives!"

"So that's how he lost his leg", stated the neighbor.

"No, that wasn't it" the farmer affirmed.

Exasperated, the neighbor demanded "Then how did he lose his leg?"

and the farmer replied, "When you have a pig that good, you don't eat him all at once!"

On 2018-07-24 14:42:31 J_69 said:
Thought it wuld be cool to laugh abit between the horniness and sum drama. But I get u

I second that. At times the forum can get too serious, and it could do with a bit of laughter. Afterall laughter is a good medicine...

It's a wonderful thought...