I have been hunting for a good decent and honest Dom here in SA. This has proven to be such a challenge.

Being a Dom does not mean I will do wtf you tell me to. Being a findom does not mean I will empty out my bank account to your name. Being a Dom does not mean you can manipulate me to get wtf you want.

Can you guess how easily this will attract money hungry providers? Amongst the con artists and scammers you find that everyone wants to be a Dom when they realise people are willing to pay handsomely for this service. I have met plenty chancers claiming to be Doms, they watched a few YouTube videos and think that is what it's about. I have also met many newbies getting conned by substandard services.

For a newbie it is so easy to get conned. There is so much school fees to be paid if you don't join the community, meet and interact with real Doms and subs. Having a few paddles, latex, flogger also does not a Dom make.

It takes a lot of research, make sure you do your research. Be on the lookout for the red flags. This fetish involves a lot of trust and respect that gets exchanged.

You can easily see how this can be taken advantage of. Being a Dom is not only about the money, it is an experience and exchange of trust. It is a highly emotional release, if not done correctly, can really cost you more than you bargain for

Shiny new outfit and a whip and you have a new title.

Just like how a piece of certified paper means one is intelligent today.

One needs passion to fulfill said title. But this is the case in general. We accept sub standard quality. In every sphere of our lives. So that's what we get more off.sadly.

.Yep.
Many,many people thinks BDSM is simply a superficial thing.
As it's becoming more and more mainstream so does the misconceptions become norm

On 2021-11-01 08:04:44 Sage said:
.Yep.
Many,many people thinks BDSM is simply a superficial thing.
As it's becoming more and more mainstream so does the misconceptions become norm

You are absolutely correct. Very few of us in the community know this and hear the stories from newbies.

The moment someone requests a new fetish or term. We get a new expert that Google the definition of the term, and now she offers it as part of her services. It's all fun and games until something goes horribly wrong.

BDSM is not just one thing, or 50 shades. There are so many fetishes, kinks, etc. To properly understand it, it takes a lot of trust.

When that trust is broken by fake wannabe Doms or con artists, then it becomes very off putting and you get a sour taste for the experience.

On 2021-11-01 08:12:41 AnthonyEdwards said:
On 2021-11-01 08:04:44 Sage said: .Yep.
Many,many people thinks BDSM is simply a superficial thing.
As it's becoming more and more mainstream so does the misconceptions become norm


You are absolutely correct. Very few of us in the community know this and hear the stories from newbies.

The moment someone requests a new fetish or term. We get a new expert that Google the definition of the term, and now she offers it as part of her services. It's all fun and games until something goes horribly wrong.

BDSM is not just one thing, or 50 shades. There are so many fetishes, kinks, etc. To properly understand it, it takes a lot of trust.

When that trust is broken by fake wannabe Doms or con artists, then it becomes very off putting and you get a sour taste for the experience.

yes and as you've mentioned physical or emotional harm can be caused.
M/s can be a powerful healing tool but not in the hands of a careless individual

On 2021-11-01 08:18:18 Sage said:


yes and as you've mentioned physical or emotional harm can be caused.
M/s can be a powerful healing tool but not in the hands of a careless individual

Exactly, nobody would not be visiting your neighbors backyard for them to do surgery on you because they said that they saw a youtube video.

This takes lots of training, experience and understanding.

There's no such thing as a dominatrix, just submissive men.

Ok all now relax!?

This can be solved but as with all punting it's a trial and error thing.
Come see me I have different packages for different levels of interest!

All can be resolved with a clear communication

Ok all now relax!?

This can be solved but as with all punting it's a trial and error thing.
Come see me I have different packages for different levels of interest!

All can be resolved with a clear communication

Ok all now relax!?

This can be solved but as with all punting it's a trial and error thing.
Come see me I have different packages for different levels of interest!

All can be resolved with a clear communication