One could be a leading global economist.

A scholar of note... knowing the philosohers and, an avid reader of all topics fictional too.

Surround oneself with what one perceives as beauty and knowledge.

Pockets deep and revered by one's fellow circle and, those looking in, that public facade for their acceptance and approval.

Yet, in the very pit of one's tummy , gnaws a hollowness, an indescribable self destruction.... those philosophers words becoming jumbled, personal interpretations and a conundrum upon conundrum of concepts, beliefs, choices and ideas.

Those that claim to know themselves might know themselves better than others...at ONE point in time...for, personal realization should be a dynamic, ever evolving research of self and those we interact with and our surroundings ...ever changing, ever demanding.

The arrogance of excuse....the rght or entitlement of..."why should I? I too have rights.. freedom of choice?"

Looking to statistics and....ironically everything one might despise happens...becoming a statistic.

There are always comparisons because without them, how would we know any better

And then...that comparison within a comparison the philosophies of why YES and why...NO!

I shared in the company of a BRILLIANT mind.

I tried to absorb as much as I could...i was in awe yet, sad .

For...when his manic need of trying to express the depth of an agony that, most probably, was the reason he became who he was,destined to be and is...I saw in his eyes, I felt in his hug a,human being so brilliant yet, disassociated from self and in desperate need of being valued for who HE was

He did not see the tears well up in my eyes nor feel the pain I tried to absorb from him...to give him a little bit of reprieve from a mind brilliantly busy, in order to focus on self and, realise what a special man he is.

This is for you....I do hope I shall have the pleasure of long long lonnnng hours in your company where u shall share your brilliance and expose me to knowledge I always crave.

I kiss you sincerely and in your manic madness of wanting to "know " i see myself too, I shall find my kaleidoscopic world enriched and new concepts posed and questioned from a different angle approached.

I

See

YOU.

Thank YOU for noticing me .

x