To cheer up your Friday..

There once was a girl form Hong Kong
Who said to her lover "Ah Wong
Its not my virgina
That's the biggest in China
It's you little chop stick that's all wrong"

And to comment on current events:

There once was an escort from Hong Kong
Who said to TheImp "Now just how long
I will give you slow blow
Requires you show
The money that to me does belong."

Whoahahahah...thank you guys

Well cone guy_g
Another one - what can you do with this

There once was a bishop of Buckingham
Who was thinking of tits and of sucking them
When watching the stunts
of the cunts in the punts
and the tricks of the pricks
that were fucking them.

There once was a man from Nantucket
Who's dick was so long he could suck it
He said with a grin
While wiping his chin
If my ear was a hole I could fuck it.

There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose wife was as loose as a bucket
He thought as he thrusted
This cunt is so busted
My dick is so limp I can't even fuck it.

There once was a man from Hong Kong
who had a meter of flesh he called a schlong
Whenever he needed a girl or a wife
to add some spice to his life
he'd use that meter to fire a gong

There once was a man from Gauteng
who said: Ek like darrie deng
He'd sit all day on google
to find something decent to ogle
and now he's writing kak little rhymes instead of spending proper money on making a Friday as entertaining as it should be.

Fourphuxaches now my head hurts.

There once was a cheapskate in Purpleland
Who was thinking of tits squeezing in his hand
He unwisely said it
"Can I do it on credit?"
And was told his trick prick should go fuck sand

Not very good, but that was a hard one (no pun intended)

Not my work, but really hilarious:

Nyphomaniacal Alice
Used a dynamite stick for a phallus.
They found her vagina
In North Carolina,
And her asshole in Buckingham Palace.

There was a young man of Bombay
Who fashioned a cunt out of clay,
But the heat of his prick
Turned it into a brick,
And chafed all his foreskin away.

- Quoted from, The Limerick, edited by G. Legman

There was a young man named Dave
Who kept a dead whore in a cave,
She smelled just like shit,
And was missing a tit,
But think of the money he'll save! (Boooooyaaaaaaa, any ladies?!!! ;-) )


Last one for now:

An amorous sailor of Brighton
Said to his girl, "You're a tight one!"
She said, "'pon my soul,
You're in the wrong hole,
And there's plenty of room in the right one!"

And one especially for Syren

The girl form the Doll house is one
who is giving the purple some fun
She strokes and she strokes
all parts of the blokes
so well that they're back at a run

Alternative

The girl form the Doll house is one
who is giving the purple some fun
She massages and strokes
the cocks of the blokes
they cum with a gush for this hun

Nothing to do on a Friday afternoon -well not yet.

On 2017-09-08 13:59:07 gary_g said:
And to comment on current events:

There once was an escort from Hong Kong
Who said to TheImp "Now just how long
I will give you slow blow
Requires you show
The money that to me does belong."

Hahaha